Discipline

Discipline

Master/slave Discipline and correction

(self -discipline active / passive correction)

Possibly in a bad Hollywood B movie or a Fred's Garage S/M porno production the notion of severe punishment would be brought to the screen for the smallest infraction, such as not saying "SIR" or "Ma'am", spilling the tea, etc. As we are all are aware, that's furthest from the truth. The reality is that in order to maintain a healthy M/s relationship many steps must be put into place before punishment. I would believe that this is where the concepts of discipline & correction come to light long before the idea of punishment.

Communication:

When it comes down to discipline and correction, I find that positive communication is what works best. When things go wrong or a problem with protocol may arise, it's easy to say we will talk about it. To follow through with making time and having what may be an uncomfortable discussion can take great discipline on the Masters part. I try not to procrastinate when it comes to communication. When issues come up I find it best to address the issues ASAP. Waiting to address an issue can lessen the value of the correction that is needed. It's important to explain that the infraction(s) are not healthy or wise or simply not in line with ones desires. With that said, I think the goal of communication is to bring out awareness and motivation. Slaves give up so much, if not all, of themselves to serve. It takes great strength and a strong will to follow that path. Certainly at times correction to stay on that difficult path is needed. That communication can help motivate by demonstrating to the slave that yes, Master is concerned with the slave becoming the best person that she can be. It can be a reminder of the greater goals of your paths.

Good communication/conversation can initiate and direct ones self discipline. Most people do not want to fail at a task. Most people want to please others. Most certainly slaves want to please their masters. Communication and motivation can spark that inner desire to succeed or re-kindle the slave heart. I think this method brings out pride. If one has pride in their work or service, it will be easier to have the self discipline that is needed.

Rewards: Is there a place for rewards in discipline?

(Or why slave barb is not allowed an unlimited supply of marshmallow peeps.)

Rewards fall somewhere between interesting and fun. Everyone likes rewards. It's another method of positive reinforcement. Except this time you can actually get something to hold onto. (Danger Will Robinson!! Warning : Rewards can be dangerous!)

I don't believe rewards should be used too freely or frequently. I also never promise a reward before hand. For instance "if you complete all your duties today or if you live up to the days protocol you will be rewarded with trinkets, leather, play or privileges." I believe the promise of rewards is only a bribe. The mentality of "i will do_____, so i will gain_______" does not nurture the self discipline, pride and structure my household needs. That's not the inner slave heart at work, with a desire to serve. On the flip side, rewards after the fact can be helpful. More important than the reward itself is the acknowledgement that the master is aware of what's going on and paying attention. This can help build confidence in the slave. To know that the service is not in vain can keep the slave on the right path. This can act as a way for a slave to self discipline themselves and to stay on point.

It's important to remember that rewards should not be issued all the time. I prefer to use them when growth is shown, unexpected service or showing the willingness to move to the next level. This could be a personal boundary that the slave needed to work on crossing or a particular service skill that needed to be learned. I think that type of dedication is something that should be recognized.

I don't believe that rewards are a discipline or correction tool. But I do believe

rewards can assist in perpetuating the self discipline and self correction that a slave needs.

Active and In the Now

Active and in the now discipline I think of as more of a physical or emotional tool. But I don't consider these to be punishments. They can actually be a bit fun while getting a strong point across. What makes them fun is that the master can exert a memorable correction. Yet at the same time this memorable correction is far removed from punishment.

These things can come into play when the slave forgets something or speaks out turn, etc.

They can be the things that can be giggled at or laughed along with. But at the same time a point is being made and a (quickie) correction is being implemented. These may be used while in a public setting. Some examples can be the over-the-glasses stare, the wicked pinch, the hand slap. There are too many to mention. These can act as the

band-aids for the moment, quick correction for the now. I do believe when these are used as a form of correction, some discussion at some point should follow. It may not need be a deep discussion but at least an explanation of what you saw and why the pinch, stare, etc. was enacted. This method can be "playful" and fun but most important effective. Call it a light hearted centering.

A question I started to think about is at what point should correction and discipline be turned into punishment? What actions may cause a master to harden their methods after repetitive correction has taken place but is to no avail?

The interesting thing about this topic is that there are many ways to approach it. There are many ways to keep everything in line or centered. There are many ways to administer discipline and correction. The above is a mere three theories. Every household is different. What methods of correction and discipline are used in your M/s relationships?

Hope everyone is doing well. I look forward to seeing everyone on April 4th.

Tip of the day: Please don't forget to set your clocks forward on Saturday night! Or have Your property do it!)